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HAUNTED HOUSE REVIEWS
HAUNTED ATTRACTION
ASYLUM HAUNTED SCREAM PARK
Ohio Valley Haunts
RATING: 8
Reviewed 10/20/12
Asylum Haunted Scream Park
click logo to visit their website
LOCATION & ADMISSION INFO:
3101 Pond Station Rd.
Louisville, KY  40272
(877) 588-FEAR
Fri/Sat  8PM - 2 AM
Darkness & Zombie City $20 each
or $30 Combo (online) includes both
Zombie Hunting $8 or $40 (online) for all 3
Carnivale $10 for 13 games or priced/game
Darkness Falls on Asylum Zombie City Xterminate Zalien Attack Carnivale of Lost Souls
REVIEW
Darkness Falls on AsylumDARKNESS FALLS ON ASYLUM:  A chained, bloody zombie named Precious terrorizes the queue line as a cemetery caretaker announces the rules for the embarking on the journey known as Darkness Falls On Asylum haunted trail.  Entrance into a castle-like structure finds bloody walls, moving floors, straight-jacketed loonies prancing about in a domain for the insane, and an immediate chainsaw initiation.  One of the crazies announces "It's all in my head!" as the path heads back outside, and through a sheet maze leading through a graveyard of caskets and an abandoned hearse where a cantankerous gravedigger threatens with a shovel, and then a doll-faced tormenter lurks along with cross-dressing freaks ushering the group into a shack where dinner is being served, and another chainsaw assault waits in the wings! Entering another rundown tool shed-like building uncovers saws, picks, and barrels being profusely displayed, along with a villain sharpening a sickle on a grinding wheel!  The reemergence of Precious chases everyone into a holiday massacre of air-blown decorations covered in blood, and guarded by the Easter Bunny and joining forces with a killer elf.  Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer's head hangs like a trophy beside Jolly Ol' St. Nick, who's wielding a cleaver guiding everyone through a lengthy claustrophobic tunnel that dumps through a green laser into an abandoned campground scene where tourists have mysteriously vanished, skeletons occupy picnic tables, and bodies roast on barbecue grills. Another nutcase in a straight-jacket precedes traversing a wooden bridge, and arriving in an arena that two hillbillies named Bubba and Cletus call home.  The rednecks speak of “UFOS” and “probing” in the presence of crop circles on the ground, and a flying saucer-like spaceship hovering overhead.  A rapidly moving vortex shifts the mood via an oversized clown head into a carnivalistic atmosphere that's complimented by loud metal music (Marilyn Manson This is Halloween cover), and features lights blinking off and on, and a secret hidden door escape route.  A second clown encounter is still to come through a barrel-lined walkway, and a Happy Birthday slaughter-fest with stalk-abouts charging down a hill!  Choosing between two different slides shoots everyone into a foam pit of “kryptonite,” then another stalk-about surprise, and a one by one cross over a swaying rope suspension bridge.  Frantic female victims scream for assistance, and beg us not to proceed because “He's in there!” Forging through a subsequent maze with several chainsaw assaults exits through spider webs into a gas-masked Ratscum stalked field adorned with wooden crosses, then into the clutches of an evil, inarticulate physician in search of a new victim that gives rise to a final chainsaw chase-out of Darkness Falls on Asylum.

Analysis:
LENGTH - 9+, 22½ mins. 
ACTORS - 8½, Costuming is good, and much of the crew is fairly intense in their delivery.  Cast size grew, and dialogue was attempted, although it still requires attention, and useless comedy needs to be abandoned.  Standout characters include Precious, "It's all in my head" girl, stalk-abouts, straight-jacketed crazies, victims, and intense chainsaw fiends.  Total Characters =38 actors (up from 24 last year). 
SCARINESS - 8, More utilization of chainsaws and actor dialogue solidify the score, but the trail still fails to have a soundtrack (music is only heard in 4 scenes), and quite a few dead zones still exist, although cast tries to cover some of them the best they can.. 
DESIGN - 7, There were various changes in comparison to last year, mostly in the first half of the trail prior to the clown encounters.  Slides are cleverly incorporated into the path once again, as well as the creaking, swaying bridge.  Secret door remains an appreciated novelty, and stalk-abouts are a pleasant addition as well.  Scene with wooden crosses is visually impressive, but the theme from Halloween plays, and there's no Myers.  On the downside, mortuary, embalming room, crematorium, giant tombstones, and animated grim reaper are all missing from cemetery.  Crawling roaches, vibrating barrels, railroad ties, sparks, zip line, refrigerator hiding a chainsaw chase, and skull mouth entrance into asylum are absent as well.  Alien invasion debuts, and hopefully departs, or experiences a make-over as it isn't scary in its present state, and the attempted comedy fell flat based on the looks of boredom on patrons' faces.  This leg of the attraction needs to concentrate on providing quality scares.
PROPS - 7, Scenes are adequately detailed, but woods are mostly quiet and undecorated.  Moving floors, slides, vortex, UFO, holiday inflatables, and claustrophobia are among the most memorable.  Lots was missing this season, much of which is listed in design above.
VALUE - 7, $20 admission is just to much, but that reduces to $15 when purchased online as a package with Zombie City.  Thankfully, no price increase was implemented for 2012.  Keep an eye on their Facebook page for coupons and special offers, and by all means utilize online ticketing whenever possible to save yourself some money.
RATING:  7½, While it's yet to realize its fullest potential, Darkness Falls on Asylum is the most popular attraction at Asylum Haunted Scream Park.  Where your FEARS come to life after dark! 

Zombie CityZOMBIE CITY:  DOOMSDAY:  A revisit to Blackwood City serves as a reminder that a year and a half ago, the zombie outbreak occurred as a consequence of contracting a deadly, airborne disease known as Rage.  The Doomsday experience gets underway with groups being ushered into an army tent by an appointed science officer.  There, the incident commander goes over some rules, and equips everyone with mandatory surgical masks to protect them from inhaling contagious viral antigens.  "Talk to the wrong ones... you won't make it through.  Make sure you talk to the right ones, you'll make it through ok." he calmly explains.  A sheriff is introduced whom visitors are told to follow.  As he pledges to get everyone “through the sewers and into the city safely,” the first encounter with the undead results in the tragic loss of the brave lawman leaving patrons on their own to fend for themselves.  A series of encounters, and random zombie attacks follow that first involves schizophrenic Dr. John Ranker of Paragon Research Labs working on Project Greenleaf - an all natural pesticide development endeavor that somehow went wrong, and now he blames himself for the apocalypse due to an "exponential shut down of synopsis in the pre-frontal cortex."  In layman's terms, that means people lose their minds.  Passing through a greenhouse, and the rest of the research facility introduces Dr. Warden who asks for the donation of a kidney to save his wife from dying.  When no offers are made, he celebrates, and releases the group into the waiting arms of bloody walls, specimen jars, x-rays, hard hats, imprisoned captives, a totally enraged nurse/secretary stressing out over her inability to properly schedule appointments, and a sudden mechanical surprise.  Moving onto the outdoors, and traversing a wooden bridge uncovers a lone female working on repairing a satellite signal, and announcing "we've got 'em caged up like lab rats out here!"  From there, it's onto an abandoned militia fighter informing intruders about the two different types of zombies, "the slow ones are the ones that have died and reanimated, and the fast ones are the ones in the last stage of infection before death"  As she's bitten by the incoming prey, fleeing onward leads the course into the shack of a redneck that becomes interactive when he selects someone at random and hands him a detonator telling him to use it if he sees a "zAmbie!"  Right on cue, one comes lunging through a window, and we get the pleasure of blasting the lifeless fiend to oblivion!  An unexpected surprise accompanies the explosion, then it's back onto the trail for engagements with Erma Blackwood discrediting ol' Mabel that lives down the holler, another melitia member desperate for fuel for his boats, the aforementioned Mabel honking a lighted Model-T horn, and grilling dogs to the tune of Patsy Cline's Walkin' After Midnight.  Finally arriving at the city reveals a military squadron frantically firing  rifles and machine guns, but fighting a losing battle against a multitude of zAmbies that are coming from everywhere.  Maneuvering through a bus exposes more of the corpsified creatures, as air-raid sirens sound, cars are overturned, windows, doors, buildings and homes are boarded up, flames erupt skyward, and renegades make one last futile attempt to rescue the innocent from Zombie City:  Doomsday.

Analysis:
LENGTH - 9+, 23 ½ (up 8 ½ minutes from last year!) 
ACTORS - 9, Actors are attired in scene adherent costuming, and cast interacts with groups the entire way through engaging them in conversation.  Drama and theatrics remain strong, however, none of the conflicts are frightening, and a good bit of this year's dialogue is meaningless babble as opposed to being of interest to survive the apocalypse. Nurse/Secretary stands out due to her emotional performance! Crazies, and Incident Commander also do a good job, as does Dr. Ranker, the latter of which is reminiscent of Exidor from Mork and Mindy who sees and hears people and things the rest of us don't, and whom he may have been cast to resemble.  On the downside, Dr. Warden jokes and celebrates regarding the imminent death of his wife, Erma Blackwood's entire rhetoric is nonesense, and there seems to be fewer conflicts with actual zombies in comparison to last year.    Total Characters = 39. 
SCARINESS - 7, The experience is more theatrical than frightening.  Zombies still reach out and try to grab onto patrons, but the comedy aspect of some of the townspeople kill the spooky mood.  Music is utilized a little, but could be put to better use.  Introduction and finish are the only parts that are scary.  The theme from Superman accompanies Dr. Ranker.
DESIGN - 8, Zombie City has been revamped for 2012, showing Blackwood City in quarantine 1 ½ years after being destroyed by the infected.  Overall duration has been lengthened, and the story picks up where last year's left off.  The course has been completely reversed, which results in saving the best for last. Interactive detonator segment is unique, and complimented with a floor "surprise."  Expectations were high after last year's amazing debut, and perhaps we over expected a bit. References to the undead didn't identify them as "zAmbies" nearly as often as last year.  It would be nice to see the focus shift more seriously onto the matter at hand, and away from entertainment.  It gets off to a good start, and Dr. Ranker is ok, but there needs to be more substance from there on in advance of the powerful finish.
PROPS - 8, Fancy animatronics and traditional décor don't exist. Scenes are believably decorated, and that's about all you can ask, but it would still be nice to see some additions.  Fire blaster, cars lining the streets, and bus are most significant. 
VALUE - 8½, Cost is $15 as part of the online combo deal with Darkness Falls on Asylum, and $20 by itself.  It's a different kind of attraction to say the least.  The main redeeming factors about this year’s product are its serious beginning, powerful climax, and longer length. 
RATING:  8, Zombie City showcases some of the most theatrical acting the haunt industry has to offer.  They have a story to tell, so pay attention, and listen to what's being said, or you won't understand.

Xterminate Zalien AttackXTERMINATE ZALIEN ATTACK:  Xterminate, Zalien Attack pikcs up where Zombie Hunting left off, but exhibits a change in format for 2012.  Paintballs are gone, but the guns are retained for the real life shooting gallery arcade that takes place inside a 9,000 square foot indoor arena.  Undead walkers come out of hiding to attack, and the object of the challenge is to ward them off in order to successfully navigate through the barrels, crates, and fence mazes to locate and secure three separate check points, and kill The Queen.  While it's more entertaining than scary, it provides another opportunity for fun at Asylum Haunted Scream Park.  "Shoot One or Become One!" in the interactive Zombie Hunting experience.
Carnivale of Lost SoulsCARNIVALE OF LOST SOULS:   A variety of fun games that can be played are available on the site as well.  These include standard carnival games like bottle stand, milk bottle, duck pond, etc.  Prizes are small, consisting of inexpensive items such as vampire fangs and skulls.  Games are priced individually "per play," between $1 and $3 each depending on how many chances one wishes to purchase, or tickets can be purchased as part of a combo deal for a reduced price.  Flame Jugglers are present for your enjoyment as well.  Carnivale of Lost Souls is all about having a good time while visiting Asylum Haunted Scream Park.
Asylum Haunted Scream ParkASYLUM HAUNTED SCREAM PARK - OVERALL EXPERIENCEMany unique opportunities exist at Asylum Haunted Scream Park.  Anchored by a traditional haunted trail called Darkness Falls on Asylum, you're actually given the chance to get involved and participate at the remainder of the attractions, Zombie City, Xterminate Zalien Attack (Zombie Hunting), and Carnival of Lost Souls.  With four drawing cards gathered together at a single location, there's really something here for the entire family!  The site is located near another very popular area attraction, and benefits from their overflow crowds, so Ohio Valley Haunts recommends you arrive early for the best experience. 
Asylum Haunted Scream Park
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